Domestic Adoption

In May Lance and I attended a meeting at the Gladney Center for Adoption. Lots of random things landed us in this particular meeting. We were there to learn about domestic African American adoption. It was so awesome!! I had never really considered this type of adoption seriously before and after attending this meeting I realized that domestic adoption, in a completely different way, is just as beautiful as international adoption. In a sense it seems more heart wrenching, meeting birth mothers that are engaging in the most selfless thing you could ever do seems hard. Having someone hand you a teeny infant and watching that mother leave without her child seems almost impossible to comprehend. The instant change in status for both mothers involved is hard to wrap your mind around.

However, once again we were stopped in our tracks with the huge need for adoption. Adoption takes a long time. It involves opening up your heart knowing that it may be broken. This was the main "risk" we saw in this type of adoption. We saw how in Domestic adoption you could very likely meet a child and think you were going home with it and then all can change in a moments notice. People say that international adoption isn't for the faint of heart and that's true. However, after seeing both sides I feel like domestic adoption REALLY isn't for the faint of heart and I have so much respect for everyone involved in a domestic adoption.

Anyway, after this meeting Lance and I went to Chuys and were seriously on cloud nine with excitement talking about Jane having a sibling that looks like her. Not only that but this baby could be here soon!! We spoke with our agency and told them our plans to peruse a concurrent adoption. Our adoption coordinator was equally excited about all of it and we talked through a few little things and were given the OK!

Well, a few things then occurred and after a month of praying and talking this through we realized that this was just not the time to adopt another baby. I was really sad. They gave us 90 days to make our final decision. Today was day 90 and I had to email and tell them "not yet". I was really sad. However, if you were to ask me my feelings on domestic adoption, I would tell you that I think it is one of the most beautiful things ever. I would tell you that I would be shocked if we make it to the end of parenthood without having adopted domestically.

Sometimes I feel like God keeps telling me to wait. However, I am learning so much in this wait. And one more thing I can add to this season of life is a growing love for domestic adoption! It's amazing. And I feel strongly that it can't be put in a box because NO adoption is the same. We hear stories all the time about the "risks of domestic adoption". However, to me that would be like saying I don't want to go to work because of the "risk of getting in a car accident" or I don't wanna go to the beach because of the "risk of a shark attack" (can you tell I am watching shark week as I type!). Nothing in life worth doing comes without risk. But when you take that "risk" you give God so much to work with!

I don't ever want to be still just waiting for my life to fall into place right in front if me. I want to be constantly searching for what God has in store for me. As of right now that isn't domestic adoption. However, I wish I could see what God sees because I have a feeling it just may be part of our future!