I just signed up for the 2013 Created for Care retreat in Atlanta. I went last year and it was such a wonderful experience. Imagine if your passion was cooking and someone told you to go to a beautiful resort outside Atlanta and spend 3 days with hundreds of other people who shared your passion for cooking. Then all the experts in the cooking world did cooking demonstrations all days and shared their secrets and you left feeling like you just may be able to cook a decent meal after all!
Well that's how I feel about this retreat. I went last year and could not believe all the women that shared my heart for adoption and were seriously killing it with their parenting skills! I felt like a student soaking up all the knowledge and when I left I felt like I could maybe just maybe do this whole thing too!
I REALLY hope I have a sweet little referral picture to show off to everyone once I am there. Last year we were still waiting to get on the wait list and I remember women walking around with tons of pictures of their little ones in Africa, or Asia, all over, and were so proud and so excited to finally get them home! That felt like such a distant reality for me at that point! By the retreat we will have been waiting about 12 months so I think it is a real possibility that we will finally know what Jane's sweet little face looks like. However, it is also a very real possibility that we won't know yet either and that's ok too....apparently these things can't be rushed hehe!
Very excited to see what is in store this year and see where we are as a family by January 25!
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
Tuesday, August 14, 2012
Domestic Adoption
In May Lance and I attended a meeting at the Gladney Center for Adoption. Lots of random things landed us in this particular meeting. We were there to learn about domestic African American adoption. It was so awesome!! I had never really considered this type of adoption seriously before and after attending this meeting I realized that domestic adoption, in a completely different way, is just as beautiful as international adoption. In a sense it seems more heart wrenching, meeting birth mothers that are engaging in the most selfless thing you could ever do seems hard. Having someone hand you a teeny infant and watching that mother leave without her child seems almost impossible to comprehend. The instant change in status for both mothers involved is hard to wrap your mind around.
However, once again we were stopped in our tracks with the huge need for adoption. Adoption takes a long time. It involves opening up your heart knowing that it may be broken. This was the main "risk" we saw in this type of adoption. We saw how in Domestic adoption you could very likely meet a child and think you were going home with it and then all can change in a moments notice. People say that international adoption isn't for the faint of heart and that's true. However, after seeing both sides I feel like domestic adoption REALLY isn't for the faint of heart and I have so much respect for everyone involved in a domestic adoption.
Anyway, after this meeting Lance and I went to Chuys and were seriously on cloud nine with excitement talking about Jane having a sibling that looks like her. Not only that but this baby could be here soon!! We spoke with our agency and told them our plans to peruse a concurrent adoption. Our adoption coordinator was equally excited about all of it and we talked through a few little things and were given the OK!
Well, a few things then occurred and after a month of praying and talking this through we realized that this was just not the time to adopt another baby. I was really sad. They gave us 90 days to make our final decision. Today was day 90 and I had to email and tell them "not yet". I was really sad. However, if you were to ask me my feelings on domestic adoption, I would tell you that I think it is one of the most beautiful things ever. I would tell you that I would be shocked if we make it to the end of parenthood without having adopted domestically.
Sometimes I feel like God keeps telling me to wait. However, I am learning so much in this wait. And one more thing I can add to this season of life is a growing love for domestic adoption! It's amazing. And I feel strongly that it can't be put in a box because NO adoption is the same. We hear stories all the time about the "risks of domestic adoption". However, to me that would be like saying I don't want to go to work because of the "risk of getting in a car accident" or I don't wanna go to the beach because of the "risk of a shark attack" (can you tell I am watching shark week as I type!). Nothing in life worth doing comes without risk. But when you take that "risk" you give God so much to work with!
I don't ever want to be still just waiting for my life to fall into place right in front if me. I want to be constantly searching for what God has in store for me. As of right now that isn't domestic adoption. However, I wish I could see what God sees because I have a feeling it just may be part of our future!
However, once again we were stopped in our tracks with the huge need for adoption. Adoption takes a long time. It involves opening up your heart knowing that it may be broken. This was the main "risk" we saw in this type of adoption. We saw how in Domestic adoption you could very likely meet a child and think you were going home with it and then all can change in a moments notice. People say that international adoption isn't for the faint of heart and that's true. However, after seeing both sides I feel like domestic adoption REALLY isn't for the faint of heart and I have so much respect for everyone involved in a domestic adoption.
Anyway, after this meeting Lance and I went to Chuys and were seriously on cloud nine with excitement talking about Jane having a sibling that looks like her. Not only that but this baby could be here soon!! We spoke with our agency and told them our plans to peruse a concurrent adoption. Our adoption coordinator was equally excited about all of it and we talked through a few little things and were given the OK!
Well, a few things then occurred and after a month of praying and talking this through we realized that this was just not the time to adopt another baby. I was really sad. They gave us 90 days to make our final decision. Today was day 90 and I had to email and tell them "not yet". I was really sad. However, if you were to ask me my feelings on domestic adoption, I would tell you that I think it is one of the most beautiful things ever. I would tell you that I would be shocked if we make it to the end of parenthood without having adopted domestically.
Sometimes I feel like God keeps telling me to wait. However, I am learning so much in this wait. And one more thing I can add to this season of life is a growing love for domestic adoption! It's amazing. And I feel strongly that it can't be put in a box because NO adoption is the same. We hear stories all the time about the "risks of domestic adoption". However, to me that would be like saying I don't want to go to work because of the "risk of getting in a car accident" or I don't wanna go to the beach because of the "risk of a shark attack" (can you tell I am watching shark week as I type!). Nothing in life worth doing comes without risk. But when you take that "risk" you give God so much to work with!
I don't ever want to be still just waiting for my life to fall into place right in front if me. I want to be constantly searching for what God has in store for me. As of right now that isn't domestic adoption. However, I wish I could see what God sees because I have a feeling it just may be part of our future!
Monday, August 13, 2012
Following along....
So up until about a week ago I was clueless that our adoption agency had a Facebook group. It's great because it has tons of resources about travel and what to expect and little things like hair care and all that.
The bad/good thing is that it also has updates every time someone gets a referral. So now instead of just waiting clueless until the first of each month for our number, I kind of have the urge to follow the referrals that are posted online! The thing is that not all referrals given will allow us to move because some may be for children above what we have set our age range and I don't think we move in that case. ANYWAY it is interesting and does give you an idea of movement month to month!
All that to say, it seems this has already been an AMAZING month for referrals!! So far in August, 7 have been given out! I don't totally know what that means for us yet, but I think it may possibly mean that now we are #16!!!!! I guess time will tell come Sept. 1!! But would that be awesome for what!?!?
If we could manage to move 7 spots each month from now on we could have our babies picture in no time!! But I should probably not get ahead of myself here and just be thankful for a good month!! :)
The bad/good thing is that it also has updates every time someone gets a referral. So now instead of just waiting clueless until the first of each month for our number, I kind of have the urge to follow the referrals that are posted online! The thing is that not all referrals given will allow us to move because some may be for children above what we have set our age range and I don't think we move in that case. ANYWAY it is interesting and does give you an idea of movement month to month!
All that to say, it seems this has already been an AMAZING month for referrals!! So far in August, 7 have been given out! I don't totally know what that means for us yet, but I think it may possibly mean that now we are #16!!!!! I guess time will tell come Sept. 1!! But would that be awesome for what!?!?
If we could manage to move 7 spots each month from now on we could have our babies picture in no time!! But I should probably not get ahead of myself here and just be thankful for a good month!! :)
Thursday, August 9, 2012
Her little face
It's no surprise that I am excited about our adoption. I will never forget Sept. 30 when I pushed "submit" on the computer screen, officially saying we were beginning the journey. We were then given our checklist, well I use that word lightly because this "checklist" filled an entire binder, and we were on our way. I was a crazy person and was up until 2 am for a month straight getting everything in order FAST, and was so happy to be doing it!!! We ran around Houston for a couple months getting everything ready and then were a WAITING FAMILY!! We were officially waiting for her!!
6 months has past since we were finally on the waiting list and not much happens anymore to keep adoption at the front of our minds. All we can do is wait. As hard as waiting can be, each month that passes I get more and more excited and this month in particular I think I could burst with excitement!!! Tonight I am laying awake thinking about her little face. Thinking about that precious little brown face that I will get to kiss everyday. That little face that will be my DAUGHTER. That perfect little face that we will take a 1,000 pictures of that will be plastered all over all of our walls. That little face that will always remind us just how much God loves us and just how blessed we are. That little face that will hopefully always remind us that orphans are Gods children and we are here to be Jesus to them. I know all parents say this, but I just know that little face is going to change a lot of lives. I know that because we haven't even met her yet and she has changed our lives. That little face has taught us how to trust God, love others, have patience, and pray like never before. That little face has opened our eyes to the need to step outside our "normal" with a cheerful heart. That little face is already changing our lives and I can't wait until she is here in the flesh sitting in my living room!
I often spend hours daydreaming about doing her hair and taking her to church for the first time. Watching her open up her Christmas presents and playing with her cousins. All those little things parents look forward to. But tonight all I can think about is that little face. That tiny slice of perfection that God is going to bless us with when the time is right! I can ramble on so I will leave it at this.
This makes me "get" adoption more than any other verse. Well for today at least. I am very scattered with my bible reading and am constantly floored with new revelations! :)
"For those who are led by the spirit of God are the children of God. The spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children then we are heirs-heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share his sufferings in order that we may also share his glory."
Romans 8: 14-17
God is saying here that through accepting him and sharing in his suffering we receive his spirit. By this we are made his child! Equal to his son! But this is not just any son. This is JESUS! We are now the sons and daughters of God! Let that soak in. It is pretty amazing. I believe that God is wanting us to mirror this behavior in our own lives. Where would be be without our father in heaven? If God wouldn't have so graciously accepted us we would be orphans. We would be aimless and without purpose.
I do not believe that God NEEDS us to watch over orphans in order for them to have a father. They already have their one true Father. I think he is allowing us to engage in this act of love because he knows it will bring us joy and a deeper understanding of his love for us. What better way to understand Gods love than to do your best to emulate it?
Very very humbled with this gift that hasn't even made it into our arms yet, but has completely changed us!
I will go to bed tonight praying for that perfect little face!! :)
6 months has past since we were finally on the waiting list and not much happens anymore to keep adoption at the front of our minds. All we can do is wait. As hard as waiting can be, each month that passes I get more and more excited and this month in particular I think I could burst with excitement!!! Tonight I am laying awake thinking about her little face. Thinking about that precious little brown face that I will get to kiss everyday. That little face that will be my DAUGHTER. That perfect little face that we will take a 1,000 pictures of that will be plastered all over all of our walls. That little face that will always remind us just how much God loves us and just how blessed we are. That little face that will hopefully always remind us that orphans are Gods children and we are here to be Jesus to them. I know all parents say this, but I just know that little face is going to change a lot of lives. I know that because we haven't even met her yet and she has changed our lives. That little face has taught us how to trust God, love others, have patience, and pray like never before. That little face has opened our eyes to the need to step outside our "normal" with a cheerful heart. That little face is already changing our lives and I can't wait until she is here in the flesh sitting in my living room!
I often spend hours daydreaming about doing her hair and taking her to church for the first time. Watching her open up her Christmas presents and playing with her cousins. All those little things parents look forward to. But tonight all I can think about is that little face. That tiny slice of perfection that God is going to bless us with when the time is right! I can ramble on so I will leave it at this.
This makes me "get" adoption more than any other verse. Well for today at least. I am very scattered with my bible reading and am constantly floored with new revelations! :)
"For those who are led by the spirit of God are the children of God. The spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Now if we are children then we are heirs-heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share his sufferings in order that we may also share his glory."
Romans 8: 14-17
God is saying here that through accepting him and sharing in his suffering we receive his spirit. By this we are made his child! Equal to his son! But this is not just any son. This is JESUS! We are now the sons and daughters of God! Let that soak in. It is pretty amazing. I believe that God is wanting us to mirror this behavior in our own lives. Where would be be without our father in heaven? If God wouldn't have so graciously accepted us we would be orphans. We would be aimless and without purpose.
I do not believe that God NEEDS us to watch over orphans in order for them to have a father. They already have their one true Father. I think he is allowing us to engage in this act of love because he knows it will bring us joy and a deeper understanding of his love for us. What better way to understand Gods love than to do your best to emulate it?
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
Almost time....
My summer of stay at home"ness" is quickly coming to a close. I have about a week and a half left. I am excited though to get back into a routine. I think it may take a while for me to get used to those early school mornings. Being at work at 7:30 is going to be VERY different for me. BUT so is coming home at 3:30 so I think it will be worth it! I absolutely love being in an elementary school! I can't imagine a happier bunch of people to spend my days with!!! Lord willing, this will be my last year to work full time so I am going to just be thankful for the ability to have such a wonderful job!! Im also curious to see my "office". Speech therapists are known for getting the broom closet, seriously, so we shall see!! However, the great thing about a school is you can get out and interact and make friends with the teachers. Even if I am in a closet, it will be ok!
Rested up and ready for my new venture!! So thankful for this opportunity!!
Happy Wednesday! :)
Rested up and ready for my new venture!! So thankful for this opportunity!!
Happy Wednesday! :)
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Facebook hurts.
It all started with the slight cringe I would feel every time I would see a post from a friend complaining about pregnancy or motherhood on facebook. I would read the comments and my heart would sink a little more each time. How could someone complain so openly about sleep deprivation when I would trade my house for a sleepless night? How could someone complain about being "fat" when I would trade my size small for an XL in a heartbeat if that meant I was given the amazing gift of pregnancy? How could someone actually post the status "pregnancy sucks" when I have given up SO much trying to obtain this very thing? How could my CHRISTIAN friends be so cruel? How could someone stop in the midst of one of life's greatest blessings to pick up their phone or computer and take the time to pull up facebook, type in a complaint and post it to the internet for all to see? Aren't they embarrassed? Don't they know how their complaining is coming off to others? I think the answer is NO. After noticing this mommy complaining trend I started to get really sensitive to the whole facebook thing. Its amazing how personal loss can really open your eyes to the hearts of others.
I started to notice comments complaining about EVERYTHING. Complaints about jobs, marriages, cars, houses, clothes.....just about anything you could think of. It makes me very very sad that we may be morphing into a culture where complaining is cool! As Christians we are called to have empathy. We are called to love others. We are called to be a light in a dark world. We are called to make sure that we are not harming others with our words. Any situation in life can be hard. Parenting, working, losing weight, dealing with loss, ANYTHING! And honestly, its hard to truly put yourself in others shoes unless you have been their personally. But I think before we post things for the world to see we need to stop and think about the effect our words can have on others. We need to stop and place ourselves in our friends and neighbors shoes. As Christians, there is NO place for publicly expressing bitterness and a lack of thankfulness when it comes to the blessings God gives us.
Before we complain that our "house is falling apart" lets try to remember that there are people out there that would kill to own a home. Before we complain that our husbands "left the laundry on the floor yet again " lets remember that others have been praying for a husband for years and would do just about anything to have a husband to complain about. Before we openly post that we are so mad that we have to work late lets remember that others may be in their 10th month of job hunting with little success. Before we so boldly post pictures of our new cars and expensive clothes lets remember that these very things that may not be a stumbling block for you may be a HUGE weak area for others. Lets not let our words and actions plant seeds of envy, bitterness and sadness in others. I know this post is a bit out of character for me but I just finally felt like it needed to be posted. As Christians we are called to a higher standard. We are called to love others and take captive our tongues. I know that not one person is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Me included. It is impossible to know whats going on with others and it is unavoidable to not ever slip up and post/say something that may hurt another. Believe me, I am the queen of sticking my foot in my mouth! It's just the way it is. However, I have now been personally affected by my "friends" seemingly harmless "status updates". I have been brought to tears by the hurt facebook can cause and have seen others suffer too. It makes me wonder if our words are causing more hurt than we even know. It has made me much much more sensitive to the things I say. So, as far as facebook goes I want to encourage you to stop and think before you push that little button. Let's think before we post people!!
"Jesus turned and said to Peter, Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns." Matthew 16:23
It scares me to think my words could every be a stumbling block to others. Whether they are spoken or typed. Everyone has hard days. Everyone needs to call up a friend and just vent about how things just STINK sometimes. Even good things can be hard and just downright suck at times! But lets not post it for the world to see. Emotion cannot be conveyed through typed words on a screen.
So here is my challenge to you! Next time you feel compelled to post how awful dealing with a sick baby is or how mad you are at your hubby, use facebook to thank God for the cuddle time that comes along with a sick baby or thank him for your much needed girlfriend around the block that helps you take your mind off things. Then, log off, call your mom or close friend and let it all loose while you eat a bowl of ice cream!! :)
Bottom line, just be mindful of others. Be mindful of the fact that words can hurt. And be mindful of the fact that you are sharing your thoughts with thousands of people when you post something. :)
Ok that's the end of that. Goodnight! :)
It all started with the slight cringe I would feel every time I would see a post from a friend complaining about pregnancy or motherhood on facebook. I would read the comments and my heart would sink a little more each time. How could someone complain so openly about sleep deprivation when I would trade my house for a sleepless night? How could someone complain about being "fat" when I would trade my size small for an XL in a heartbeat if that meant I was given the amazing gift of pregnancy? How could someone actually post the status "pregnancy sucks" when I have given up SO much trying to obtain this very thing? How could my CHRISTIAN friends be so cruel? How could someone stop in the midst of one of life's greatest blessings to pick up their phone or computer and take the time to pull up facebook, type in a complaint and post it to the internet for all to see? Aren't they embarrassed? Don't they know how their complaining is coming off to others? I think the answer is NO. After noticing this mommy complaining trend I started to get really sensitive to the whole facebook thing. Its amazing how personal loss can really open your eyes to the hearts of others.
I started to notice comments complaining about EVERYTHING. Complaints about jobs, marriages, cars, houses, clothes.....just about anything you could think of. It makes me very very sad that we may be morphing into a culture where complaining is cool! As Christians we are called to have empathy. We are called to love others. We are called to be a light in a dark world. We are called to make sure that we are not harming others with our words. Any situation in life can be hard. Parenting, working, losing weight, dealing with loss, ANYTHING! And honestly, its hard to truly put yourself in others shoes unless you have been their personally. But I think before we post things for the world to see we need to stop and think about the effect our words can have on others. We need to stop and place ourselves in our friends and neighbors shoes. As Christians, there is NO place for publicly expressing bitterness and a lack of thankfulness when it comes to the blessings God gives us.
Before we complain that our "house is falling apart" lets try to remember that there are people out there that would kill to own a home. Before we complain that our husbands "left the laundry on the floor yet again " lets remember that others have been praying for a husband for years and would do just about anything to have a husband to complain about. Before we openly post that we are so mad that we have to work late lets remember that others may be in their 10th month of job hunting with little success. Before we so boldly post pictures of our new cars and expensive clothes lets remember that these very things that may not be a stumbling block for you may be a HUGE weak area for others. Lets not let our words and actions plant seeds of envy, bitterness and sadness in others. I know this post is a bit out of character for me but I just finally felt like it needed to be posted. As Christians we are called to a higher standard. We are called to love others and take captive our tongues. I know that not one person is perfect and everyone makes mistakes. Me included. It is impossible to know whats going on with others and it is unavoidable to not ever slip up and post/say something that may hurt another. Believe me, I am the queen of sticking my foot in my mouth! It's just the way it is. However, I have now been personally affected by my "friends" seemingly harmless "status updates". I have been brought to tears by the hurt facebook can cause and have seen others suffer too. It makes me wonder if our words are causing more hurt than we even know. It has made me much much more sensitive to the things I say. So, as far as facebook goes I want to encourage you to stop and think before you push that little button. Let's think before we post people!!
"Jesus turned and said to Peter, Get behind me, Satan! You are a stumbling block to me; you do not have in mind the concerns of God, but merely human concerns." Matthew 16:23
It scares me to think my words could every be a stumbling block to others. Whether they are spoken or typed. Everyone has hard days. Everyone needs to call up a friend and just vent about how things just STINK sometimes. Even good things can be hard and just downright suck at times! But lets not post it for the world to see. Emotion cannot be conveyed through typed words on a screen.
So here is my challenge to you! Next time you feel compelled to post how awful dealing with a sick baby is or how mad you are at your hubby, use facebook to thank God for the cuddle time that comes along with a sick baby or thank him for your much needed girlfriend around the block that helps you take your mind off things. Then, log off, call your mom or close friend and let it all loose while you eat a bowl of ice cream!! :)
Bottom line, just be mindful of others. Be mindful of the fact that words can hurt. And be mindful of the fact that you are sharing your thoughts with thousands of people when you post something. :)
Ok that's the end of that. Goodnight! :)
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
Welcome August
We happily welcomed August today. It was a great day. The first of each month brings our wait list # update and it can range from lots of movement to a little to none. Today we moved 3 spots!!!! I was SO PUMPED!! We are now # 23. This is pretty good! Now that we have accepted the fact that it is looking like more of a 12 month wait as opposed to the short 6 months we expected, we don't get our hopes up too high and are just thrilled with movement!
They have increased wait times to 11-12 months. We have waited about 5 so we aren't doing so bad. We are getting there!! It had stopped seeming like a reality to me and today I was renewed with a sense of hope and excitement. God reminded me that we WILL get our little girl. She is coming! I CANNOT WAIT to meet her!
I am the every changing person when it comes to my emotions about this adoption, and well, most things in life, but today I am feeling hopeful and patient and am letting myself daydream about having my little girl home! I know she will be worth the wait and that makes it easier. The FOREVER that we will get to parent her will pale in comparison to the year we waited for her one day! Wow look at how rational I have become about this adoption! Patting myself on the back!! ;)
Here's a little of what we have been up to lately or what I snapped a shot of! We have had a great summer so far with lots of great things going on. We really love living in Sugar Land and are really settled now into our new suburban life! :)
Snuggling with my Weltie.....love having him around the block!
Spend the morning with my Cousin Lindsey (who is also now my neighbor!!) and Ava returned later to cook with me! :)
Had some of our good friends over for dinner with their newest addition, Parker. Love them lots!!
Went to see the Lion King!
Went to one of our old Houston favorites, House of Pies, after the show. Nothing like a burger, sweet potato fries and pie at 12am!
MMMMM....a taste of my early twenties hehe!
Took Max to get a Cake Pop
Our good friend Garrett BUILT us this bed today. I am trying to decide what color to paint it. I will post the finish product soon. Impressive right!?
Ok that's all for now! Happy August to all and I hope our fellow "waiting" friends were as happy as we were this month with their waitlist number!
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers when you face trials of many kinds, because you know the testing of your faith produced perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete not lacking anything" James 1:2-4
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