Work

So on September 3 I start work. I am only working Monday and Tuesday late afternoon/evening so not much at all, but work it is! I am very excited to get out if the house for a few hours a coupe days a week, I am very excited to be able to contribute to a few bills, I am very excited to add a little speech therapy back into my week, and I am very very excited to have 10 hours a week with some guaranteed adult interaction, conversations where people talk back (well, in my line if work people don't always talk back but that's what I'm there for hehe), and something to take my mind off all things mommy for a few minutes. 

But I will admit that leaving the girls for 10 hours a weeks, even though I 100% trust their temporary care takers and daddy, is making me uneasy! I pretty eat, sleep and breath these two baby girls. I know them inside and out and know how they tick. Well, at least this week, they do love to change it up! I am telling myself that a little distance is healthy, that they will live even if at that evening nap Zoe isn't rocked up on my shoulder and Nora in the crease of my other arm while simultaneously putting in both pacis and singing "You are my Sunshine". But it's hard for me. I'm sure it's just first mom"itis" but I just hate to change things up on them! I worry that they will have a hard time with the change and wonder where I am. Am I giving a 3.5 month old too much credit!? I have been told by those I love most hehe that I am a baby micromanager. I think it's sadly true. But this letting go thing is HARD for me! 

But I think this will be a good lesson for me. I can get in my car, put on my music and say a quick prayer knowing they are in Gods hands and he is their ultimate protector, not me. And hello, they will be with my mom at my house Monday and a sweet nanny at the house Tuesday. Then Daddy takes over! He will do great and I must say, I'm a little glad daddy gets a taste of what two babies alone are like. He is so supportive of me and helpful, but I think he will gain a more clear picture of my days with them when he sees the "fun" getting two babies fed and asleep alone brings hehe! 

But I am very thankful for my job, for the flexibility it allows and for the opportunity to switch gears from mommy to speech therapist a couple evenings a week! Not that you can ever really turn off mommy brain! 

Wish me luck! :!