Sometimes, Always......

Sometimes: I want to have tons of kids, adopted and biological, and fill up our house with as many kids as can fit!

Always: My husband reminds me to take one thing at a time, including kids! ;)

Sometimes: I try to eat really healthy and go all day on fruits, veggies and lean meat.
Always: I mess up around 7pm and eat something that throws the whole "healthy" day off.

Sometimes: Adoption scares me.
Always: I am reminded that it is not about me and faith needs to step in and fill the Gap.

Sometimes: I find myself annoyed that God has allowed by body, at least for now, not to do what it was created to do in creating a new life.
Always: I  known deep down that unanswered questions by God do not equal being forgotten by Him.
 
Sometimes: I wonder if "unexplained infertility" is really "God's timing" or if we are looking at something worse.
Always: I know that God's plans are WAY better than mine and I need to pray more and just chill out!

Sometimes: I love working and really enjoy my job.
Always: I love being home, cooking, cleaning, having lunch chats and coffee with close friends and taking care of my husband.

Sometimes: I get really mad when people ask me "Don't you want your own kids". That one sentence reduces my future children to "less" and it makes me sad. My adopted children and biological children will be equal and all my own.
Always: I am reminded that sometimes people just don't get adoption and I cannot get upset with people for what they do not understand.

Sometimes: I wonder if I will be an adequate mother to children of a different race and worry that I won't be able to raise them to respect and love their culture and themselves.
Always: I am reminded, mainly by my husband, that things will work out if our hearts are constantly seeking God's direction for them.

Sometimes: I want to go back to my natural hair color.
Always: I leave the salon blonder than when I walked in.

Sometimes: I drink diet coke at work to wake up and keep myself from eating junk food.
Always: I feel sick about the fact that I just ingested poison.

Sometimes: I worry about the idea of being responsible for learning how to do my little Ethiopian daughters hair.
Always: I get giddy excited about cute afro puffs with little bows matching little dresses and shoes!!!

Sometimes: I over think things and sometimes I am impulsive and don't think things through at all.
Always: Wish I could find a happy middle ground between the two.

Ok, I guess that's all for now. I saw this on a friends blog and thought it was a cute idea. Feel free to steal and post your "sometimes......always"!